The Complete Egg

The before, during and after of a molar pregnancy, with a side of chemo and a 12 month wait before ttc. And most recently: experience of a healthy pregnancy.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Levels down to 14!

At the Cancer Agency. It's 9:45pm. I've discovered the SILENCE button on my IV machine so the bloody thing can beep all it wants because I'm not giving it any attention. Machines do not run my life.

I'm grumpy. I was being a drama queen yesterday about the apartment. There will be others and it wasn't perfect and there will be plenty of other nice places to live. I need to stop my bitching. I really don't have it that bad and I hate being around myself when I complain. I hit SILENCE again...what was that like 30 seconds. I'm just too damn lazy to plug the thing in so the battery is low. Hang on....there I plugged it in.

New topic! My urine is not alkaline. Not anything that anyone would normally worry about but this chemo requires that I have alkaline urine so that I don't fuck up my kidneys. Boy, I am in a fine mood tonight. Oh yeah, and the nurse (who is very nice and I'm complaining again) forgot to turn the chemo drip on so I'm going to be an hour late getting out of this place. Not a huge deal but I am annoyed. So back to the urine. When I test my urine with these pH test strips I do not have alkaline urine. So I need to check one more time in a little while and then if it's not alkaline, then what?? I think they talked about a sodium chlorate (?) tablet. Whatever. At least they found a good vien this time for the IV.

My doctor basically told me to suck it up this morning. No, she didn't use those words but that was the general gist. I asked her about the discrepancy of the wait times. She has said 12 months and the other doctor (her associate) said 6 months. I shouldn't have mentioned his name. She said, and I quote, "You've probably been use to setting goals and this is frustrating but these kinds of experiences build character and make you who you are. You will get better and that's the most important thing. It could be a lot worse." Yes, that's true. Is that why I'm ranting here because I know I don't want to be complainy and I've had and have a good life. I don't want to be told not to complain even though I know I slip easily into it. I come by it honestly. My father is the king of complaining. M spent an hour talking with him over the phone trying to help him with his computer problems and my dad didn't even say thank you. When I teasingly asked him if he had thanked M for his help he said "well I still don't know what's wrong with it". "Just say thank you dad." "Okay, tell him thank you." An hour later he phones back, after he's tried M's suggestion and it worked. My dad's not so bad. I love him very much. He does complain alot though and doesn't always give thanks. I want to be grateful for things, look on the bright side of things, see the glass half-full. But who am I kidding, it doesn't come naturally. I will try though. I needed a poor me day today.

Enough, I've got to go test my pee.

1 Comments:

Blogger Jen said...

yay for 14! and poop on your doctor!

5:38 PM  

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