The Complete Egg

The before, during and after of a molar pregnancy, with a side of chemo and a 12 month wait before ttc. And most recently: experience of a healthy pregnancy.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

A year minus a day

That's how long ago I had my last massage. That's also when I was first pregnant and didn't yet know it except for that irrational connection I made with a new life inside of me during my massage. I remember lying there as the shiatsu massage therapist manipulated my limbs and I thought, "I'm pregnant" and a few days later I confirmed it. I was so sad tonight to realize it was exactly a year ago. What bad luck I've had. I'm trying to count my blessings but I couldn't believe the coincidence. I don't think I can wait the full year. My body is screaming about wasting time and get on with in already!! Fuck, fuck, fuck! Sorry, I don't usually cuss but that sums up how I'm feeling. I AM SICK OF WAITING! Where is the patience? Gone and out the window.
So mad and upset tonight.

1 Comments:

Blogger Anna said...

Oh Chantelle! That is so tough. Doesn't it suck when even beautiful things bring up the crap reminders!? You have come a long way and it really has been a rough road for you. I admire you so much. I am so thankful that you share your good and bad days here... big virtual hug to you!

2:23 AM  

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