We went in for the midwives' appointment yesterday with L and actually it went really well. I feel okay about her being at the birth if it ends up being her (and I feel like it will be C in the end). So not sure how or why my feelings changed. Maybe I was feeling spooked or something. I don't know.

I feel as ready as I can be I guess. I've walked through the procedure in my imagination. The whole birth happens really quickly from what I understand. It will be quite a trip. Apparently, I can watch the baby being birthed and they will lay him or her on my stomach as they cut the cord. I know that things may not all go as planned but I sure hope everything is straight-forward. Try to stay present focussed. That will help with the anxiety. I'm kind of disgusted with how many lists I've had going and the amount of planning I've been doing. I need to chill out! I'm trying to nap a lot in between the cleaning and organizing. Ah, speaking of napping...